Tuesday, June 10, 2014

spoken in the shop, vol. 14.



On special orders
Customer: "I have a special order you guys have been holding for me."
Me: "Great! What's your last name?"
Customer: "Nix."
Me: "Hmmm. I don't see anything here under that name. How long ago did you place the order?"
Customer: "Oh, four years ago."

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On rewards
Three-year-old boy: "We're here to get a birthday book for my friend Blair, and if I obey my dad I get a Starburst."

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On upper-level reading
"Do you know what a chapter book is? My grandson reads something called chapter books, and I'm supposed to get him one."

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On young adult literature
"Is it tragic, or does she just, like, die?"

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On local landmarks
"What's the big deal with the Big Oak anyway?"

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On love and money
Mom: "Veronica, bring your books up here! We need to pay."
Girl: "Oh, so this is the paying kind of place?"
Mom, laughing: "Yes, Veronica. Everything costs money."
Girl, waits a beat: "What about love?"

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On very specific tastes
"My husband likes sports. And he's a funeral director. Do you have anything on mortuaries or something like that?"

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On exaggerating
Me: "I'm afraid we don't have that book in stock, but I'd be happy to order it for you."
Customer: "No, y'all have ordered books for me before, and it's taken them three years to get here."
Me: "Well, that's absurd since it normally takes two to three days."
Customer: "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

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On important dates
Customer, at checkout: "Do you know when Father's Day is?"
Me: "Sunday."
Customer leaves checkout for the greeting cards.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my word... "on love and money" is SO sweet!!

xx Katie
lovely letters

Amanda said...

That first one had me laughing out loud. Four years ago! Oh my word how do you not laugh in front of them. Elizabeth Ivie sent me your way and am really glad that she did.