Tuesday, March 11, 2014

spoken in the shop, vol. 11.

On fertility
Male customer: "How old are you now?"
Me: "28."
Male customer: "You got baby fever yet?"
Me: "No, not really. Not in a hurry."
Male customer: "Well, you're pretty much at your peak. Time'll be running out soon. Gets harder after 30."


On faces with names and names with faces
Author, in store for a signing: "You look nothing like I would have ever pictured."
Me: "Well, what exactly were you picturing?"
Author: "Shirley Temple." 


On Llama, Llama books
4-year-old-girl: "So did Llama's dad die or something?"


On drinking soda
"Mama, can I have some bubble face?"


On that dirty word, e-books
 Child at story time: "Are we going to read on the Nook today?"


On the joy of giving
"Could I have this wrapped? It's a congratulations-you're-knocked-up gift."


On why Google exists
Customer: "Got any books on peach brandy?"
Me: "No, sir, I don't think we do. I might have some books on cocktails or beer brewing, though."
Customer: "Oh no, I don't need a book. Can you just print me the formula?"
Me: "Like you need a recipe for peach brandy?"
Customer: "Yes, ma'am. That'd be great."


Chet said...

the first one made me cringe.
the last one made me laugh.

Brittany said...

As always, I love this!

lacey said...

hahaha. one peach brandy coming right up! i love these spoken in the shop posts. linked to you in my own blog post today. happy friday!

Rachel Elizabeth said...

I love this. It's amazing what people will actually say out loud.