Monday, February 11, 2013

salvation, part ii.


I don't think I say it often enough, so I thought I would say it today, in the middle of this month of joy and gratitude and celebration and love.

One of God's greatest gifts to me in this life is my husband and his daily decision to work out our salvation together. 

Jordan reads a lot of my posts before I publish them -- particularly ones about faith -- and he and I have had, already in our marriage, innumerable conversations about our spiritual walks. I cannot tell you what a comfort it is to have someone -- to borrow an evangelical catchphrase -- do life with me, someone who sits and listens to me as I vent at the dinner table, someone who handles my day-to-day frustrations and confusions with grace. 

I love that my home is a "safe zone," a place where we can ponder Scripture, pray for wisdom, and ask questions about the faith we love so much. I don't think I realized how important that would be before marriage, so if you're single, consider this one of the only pieces of marriage advice I will ever give (at least now, while I'm still in my 20s and learning about it). 

Marry someone who will listen, not react. Marry someone who will look you in the eye, take your hand, and pray for you. Marry someone who will discuss and challenge your beliefs. Marry someone who is constantly growing and moving, not content to remain the same in their faith, year after year. 

As I work out my salvation with fear and trembling, I am eternally grateful I am not doing it alone. We are doing it together, and it is making us better. 

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Wow, wow, and again wow. I am right there with you. Marriage when done right is a safe zone. When the church is right it too is a safe zone.
I enjoy extended family as a place to share and discuss faith and to vett plans for the future. What a blessing it is to have good and caring spouse. (When children are added in they tuly challenge us to be better at our core, even psuedo children).

UR

Anonymous said...

Your line "marry someone who will listen, not react" is so true. I've had friends and family who instantly criticize or give advice when I'm going through a confusing time with faith, but it's nice to know that I can always have a listening ear (at least at first, advice might come later) with the fiance.

Anonymous said...

Your line "marry someone who will listen, not react" is so true. I've had friends and family who instantly criticize or give advice when I'm going through a confusing time with faith, but it's nice to know that I can always have a listening ear (at least at first, advice might come later) with the fiance.

Rachel W said...

I agree with you Annie. I think that has been one of the greatest comforts Russ and I have enjoyed, just being able to talk about what is happening with us spiritually. I also find that I'm excited about us making spiritual decisions as a couple; I find simple tasks like deciding together who to give money to and how much and deciding what we, as a family, can do when someone is in trouble to be very, very encouraging.

Angela said...

Such great wisdom! I love that my husband will first listen and not react. He is the calmest most level headed person I know and I can vent to him about any spiritual questions or issues I may be struggling with. I also love the phrase "doing life" and feel SO blessed to be doing life with him. :)

Erin said...

Mmmmm... Yes! I love this, Annie! What a gift.
I see this as a key part of growing together in holiness. We have to be able to listen and grow and encourage. I love the way you describe it as a daily decision to work out your salvation together.
I am grateful for this gift in my marriage, too.
It's huge!