Grief and sorrow are hard things, and sometimes, the road mourners travel becomes a very lonely one. Friends are uneasy, unsure what to do in times of trial, and their uncertainty cripples them to do nothing. Others offer to do something, but leave it up to the mourner to decide what. Still others retreat, thinking being distant and quiet is what the mourner needs.
The Lord and I had several conversations throughout the month of January. When other friends were not as understanding as I would have hoped, I decided: I could mope and whine and complain about my loneliness and their treatment of my grief, or one day, I could become the comforter. I could comfort in the ways God was teaching me were good, compassionate, and kind.
God was turning me from a sympathizer into an empathizer.
Read today's post over on Beautifully Rooted.
3 comments:
I've been on both sides of this issue and so very much hope I am becoming a doer to those who grieve. I've always said, "Please let me know if there is anything I can do...". How are folks really supposed to know what they need - sometimes a thing "to do" comes up and you know you can call someone to handle "it". But, I normally wouldn't want to call someone to come or go do something for me - I wouldn't want to bother them or cause them to have to reschedule their day (or night)...though I'm in mid-life, it's never too late to go ahead and just DO or GO. Be there, sit there beside someone even quietly. Hug them, hold their hand, bring them a little something to eat. I hope I'm becoming more like my mother, who was a pro at these things...
Thoughtful and applicable post. It reminds me of the idea of "paying it forward". Once someone has shown us love and support, we almost owe it to the cosmos to show that love and compassion to others. And then we pray they show it to others and on and on. There are just some things you have to experience to be able to truly understand....and you are right that grief is on of them. PS- That Bible verse is a personal favorite. It comforts me just like the feeling of a warm blanket on a cold night. Amen for God's word and reminders in our life. A true light in the dark.
Wow. Definitely hitting home with the recent events in my life. Feeling like this whole experience has made me so much more compassionate. I thought I was before. And man, do I want to provide the same comfort I've been receiving the last several weeks. It would be great to pay it forward.
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