Monday, March 14, 2011

a lucky one.

 {Kyodo News via the Associated Press and the Today Show}

I had written this post prior to last week's devastation in Japan, but now, more than ever, these words seem appropriate. You can donate through the Red Cross here, or comment on this post. I'll make an additional donation of $5 for every comment received (up to $150), in the hopes that every little bit we can do will make a big difference. 

-- 

There are days when I almost can’t breathe from the heaviness of tragedy that permeates this life. I hear about car accidents and young brides with cancer and families who suffer and I want to know: Why? And why not me?

I get so caught up in these stories, these sad stories of loss and grief and pain, and I am consumed with the thought that I have been lucky.

Not just blessed, but lucky.

For so long, I have chosen to use blessed instead of lucky to describe my circumstances, a mark of my belief in an all-knowing Creator, but the truth is: Sometimes, you just feel lucky. Because if my possessions and my family and my gifts are blessings, what of those people who are homeless and alone and struck by the slap in the face that is tragedy? What of them? Are they not blessed? Are they less blessed than I am? Is there a sliding scale of blessing?

I don't know.

So today I feel like one of the lucky ones.

And I am in awe of the fact that I am still here. Still breathing.

The prayers escaping from my mouth move from words of why to words of thanks.

And all I can do is ask that I make these days — however many there are — worth it. That I do them justice. That I honor the King who has given them to me.

It is heavy, the weight of loss and grief. I do not claim to carry it well, nor do I claim to know why it befalls us and when. I can’t answer those deep theological questions that leap from people’s lips so quickly during painful times. I do not know the whys and the why nots.

So instead I just ask: Make my life be worth it. Make the days I have full of adventure and peace and love and good.

Because each day I wake up breathing, I am one of the lucky ones.

---

For the Lord is a great God, and a great King above all gods. In his hand are the caverns of the earth, and the heights of the hills are his also. The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands have molded the dry land.

- Psalm 95:3-5

22 comments:

Felicia said...

what a lovely, well-worded post. i often have to remind myself to live with gratitude. my favorite quote is "Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” -Denis Waitley

you are so generous with your donations. you're right, every bit counts.

i discovered your blog yesterday afternoon and i am in love with your posts.

*Priscilla* said...

How generous, Annie! How can I NOT comment?? I love the verses from Psalms you added at the end. How appropriate. Joining you and so many others in prayer for those in Japan.

Julianne said...

Annie- I think what you're doing with your donation is wonderful. I also often wonder how and why I have been so lucky or blessed whenever I hear tragic stories of others. Usually, when these thoughts come into my head I end up remembering what our precher says: We are blessed to be a blessing. I guess that phrase answers some of the why's for me and helps set me back on track! :) You're such a sweet person! Great post!

Cindy P said...

Thank you for being so generous and doing this for the people of Japan. I am with you in praying for the country. It's truly a horrible tragedy.

Sometimes I feel the way you do about being lucky vs. blessed. However, I believe that everyone really is blessed. Even those who are homeless and alone who have faith will consider themselves blessed for some reason or another. They may not be blessed for the same reasons we are, but they are nonetheless. A few people I know who are homeless feel blessed just to be alive and have a church family who cares for them. It's really humbling to me to see those who are struggling so much yet they have such a positive attitude and do think of themselves as blessed because so often, if even the smallest thing in my life isn't going my way I feel frustrated and bummed. Just something to think about. =)

monster cakes said...

You have such a wonderful heart. I will donate, and I will comment so that every little bit can help!

Lately I have been thinking about tragedy's like this too. Why do some people suffer more than others? Then I remember that there is a bigger spiritual battle going on that we cannot see. Satan is on a mission to get us to think and say that God is not good. When tragedy strikes, our role on this earth is to simply say "God is good. No matter what." Sometimes for me, that is the point of tragedies. To always declare that God is good and prove the enemy wrong. It may not explain things, but it makes me feel like I'm doing my part.

Mallory Camille said...

what an inspiring post, I think about this all the time. Thank you for your perspective. Praying for our friends in Japan.

hannah singer said...

beautiful! thanks for sharing!

sashyjane said...

Joining you in praying for a life that's "worth it."

Cherry Tree Lane said...

you are awesome!

Jen said...

You are so generous with your donation. Everyone affected by these disasters will be in my thoughts.

Anonymous said...

Praying for everyone and bless you for your generosity :)

Anonymous said...

I enjoy reading your blog, and I appreciate your generosity. I am praying for everyone affected by this disaster.

The Every Day Extraordinary said...

Beautiful post. Generous heart...

M said...

love this post. agree 100%. so eloquently put! lovely lovely.

Jennifer said...

I love your heart here. I just saw a place to give on PASSION: 265 Generation's website and plan on giving there. You are so right. We are more than blessed. I want to make my life worth it too.

aPearantly sew said...

Such a beautifully written post, and such a generous heart you have!

Four Flights said...

you know how much I love this. thank you for being an inspiration.

krb said...

I too feel exactly as you do - blessed by God, and lucky. Last week, and still in this moment, I wonder why things happen the way they do, and why they happen to some and not others, and still I do not know.

You're generous in your donation, and I am grateful that there are still wonderful people out there such as yourself.

God Bless,
Kelsey

Eva Marie said...

Wonderful idea, and so glad to leave a comment

Christy said...

Beautiful, wonderful, generous idea!

Manda said...

Such a beautiful heart you have. I also feel a tug on my heart to give and live generously. Be blessed.

Manda said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.