Monday, November 16, 2015

spoken in the shop, vol. 25.



On you just never know what folks are going to say
After purchasing both The Happiness Project and Down the Rabbit Hole, customer:
"First I'll read how to be happy, then I'll read the slut!"

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On customers' ongoing love affair with Stanley Tucci
"Oh look, Stanley Tucci! He's so cute. And he married a much younger woman."

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On you-asked-for-it bread puns
Customer: "Have you ever read The Scarlet Pumpernickel?"
Manager: "Sure, that goes great with The Catcher in the Rye."

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On North vs. South
Customer, waiting at register: "Excuse me, what's going on here?"
Manager, looking for pen box: "I'm sorry; I have to find the box for this pen so I can scan it in our system. Thank you for your patience!"
Customer: "Oh, I'm on vacation. If I wasn't, I'd be biting your head off right now. I'm from New York." 

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On #girlboss
"Annie is hundred-year-old wisdom in a -- how old is she now? Twenty-six?"

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On the definition of poetry
Bookseller: "I know what good poetry is when I see it, kind of like pornography."
Customer: "Oh, so good pornography is poetry."
Bookseller: "I think it's more that good poetry is pornography."

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On #goals
Bookseller to 8-year-old girl: "Would you like a bag for your book?"
Little girl: "No, I'm going to read it while I'm walking. If I run into a pole, I'll call it a victory."

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On we're going to make it after all
"You're the heartbeat of this damn town, that's for sure!"

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